25 Seconds of Happy Dance
At Big Basin Redwoods State Park, proof of amazing resilience three years after the 2020 Lightning Complex Fires. Says biological sciences professor George Koch at the University of Nevada Las Vegas: “The CZU Fire consumed all of the leaves on some of the tallest and oldest trees in the world, yet many are recovering. Redwoods’ scientific name is ‘sempervirens,’ which means ever-flourishing. It’s very satisfying to have learned a bit more about how this remarkable species lives up to its name.”
YouTube Video
Cool. The only thing I’ve seen grow back faster than those redwoods is my nose hairs. Ha ha ha!
Cheers and Jeers for Thursday, December 14, 2023
Note: For the treatment of minor aches and pains, ask your doctor if asking your doctor is right for you. And just to be sure, ask your doctor if asking your doctor for a second opinion from your doctor is right for you. Then just go grab a fistful of pills from the dispensary when they’re not looking and run like hell.
—Your Friends at BillyCo Mystery Pharmaceuticals
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2 days!!!
By the Numbers:
Days 'til Festivus: 9
Days 'til the 250th anniversary of the Boston Tea Party: 2
Estimated percent of active-duty ground troops that Russia has lost—around 315,000—versus what it had before its invasion of Ukraine: 87%
Portion of its tanks Russia has lost: 2/3
Rank of Paris, Dubai, and Madrid in the latest Top 100 City Destinations Index by Euromonitor International: #1, #2, #3
Rank of highest-ranked U.S. cities New York and Los Angeles: #8, #19
Number of holiday trees in the Biltmore Estate in Asheville, North Carolina: 67
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Your Thursday Molly Ivins Moment:
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Puppy Pic of the Day: This one has a squirrel cameo…
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CHEERS to informed opinions. One of the imperatives in this crazy world is holding the powerful to account when they make predictions. The bolder their prediction, the accountier the holding must be. And one year ago this week, our illustrious Treasury Secretary Janet Yellen told 60 Minutes that inflation would be "much lower" by…well, by this time right now. So let's check with the Bureau of Labor Statistics to compare last year's inflation rate and this year's:
Excellent—a solid prediction, Janet. Well done. But we're still a little disappointed. Nothing, not a word, about dropping bundles of cash from helicopters over major New England cities to spur economic growth by letting it trickle down to the rest of the country. Honest to god, I don’t know why I even bother to call her every night at 3am with my brilliant ideas.
CHEERS to payback time. I'm all-in for the elimination of gerrymandering. The sooner we have federal legislation appointing independent commissions to fairly decide district maps, the better. But until then, Republicans will continue cranking out House districts that look like the gooey trail a drunk snail leaves behind on the sidewalk and Democrats better be ready to reciprocate. So this is welcome news in the Empire State:
Flip 'em all, I say. “Congratulations, Speaker Hakeem Jeffries” has such a nice ring to it.
CHEERS to “Moscow Maggie.” Happy 126th birthday to Maine's own Margaret Chase Smith. She was the first woman to serve in both the U.S. House and Senate, and she reserved some choice not-so-nice words for Senator Joseph McCarthy (who responded by giving her the aforementioned nickname). And get a load of this from 1950, which would no doubt get her branded a libturd by the right-wing noise machine today:
Yeah. They'd be crazy to try that. And don’t call me Shirley.
JEERS to missing 1800 by 18 days. He came this close. On December 14, 1799,George Washington died at age 67 (which was actually quite old for his family, relatively speaking, given how many of his relatives died at a younger age). He caught a cold during a horseback ride in the rain, but forensic historians suspect that the real reason he expired was the 300-pound leech doctors attached to him to drain his "tired" blood. I read in the book His Excellency by Joseph Ellis (highly recommended) that the last thing Washington did before he died was check his own pulse. Which probably explains his last words: "Oh, that ain't good."
CHEERS to kicking the bums out. Though it often seems like authoritarian governments are damn-near impossible to dislodge, that ain't always the case. Exhibit A this week is Poland, where the unthinkable just got thunk:
Excellent. It'll be nice watching them join the ranks of enlightened nations again. By the way: if you're wondering how many Poles it takes to change a light bulb, shame on you. Shame shame shame shame shame.
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Ten years ago in C&J: December 14, 2013
JEERS to life inside the bubble. Last week Fox News host Megyn Kelly caused a stir when she made a big fat hairy deal out of the alleged "fact" that both Jesus and Santa Claus are "just white." Friday she backpedaled and claimed that—of course!—her race-baiting was the ha-ha jokey kind of race baiting, people. Which it wasn't, because neither she nor her guests cracked a smile at the time (except Candy Crowley, but that's just the perma-botox). But her real problem this morning isn’t with the left's criticism of her comments. Rather it's with her conservative viewers, who thought she was gloriously correct about white SantaJesus, but are now wondering why she's gone all Massachusetts Kum By Yah Liberal on them. It's left them fearful, confused and agitated. In other words: Megyn Kelly has done her job well.
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And just one more…
CHEERS to D-Day 2020. Can’t let today slide by without noting that December 14th will be noted as the day America—and all the restaurants, theaters, gyms, and bowling alleys therein—was saved by a bunch of little pricks. And I admit that I remember getting a bit verklempt watching it happen:
The vaccines (and the follow-up miracle covid happy pills) have come a log way since then. For instance, one of the tricky things about that early vaccine was it keeping it stored in a receptacle that was super-duper-icy cold. Today they can just be shipped under normal refrigeration. But it was pretty dicey back then. The only known way for each shipping container to reach minus-94 degrees Fahrenheit was to let it be stared at for 30 seconds by Laura Ingraham.
Have a nice Thursday. Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?
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At Big Basin Redwoods State Park, proof of amazing resilience three years after the 2020 Lightning Complex Fires. Says biological sciences professor George Koch at the University of Nevada Las Vegas: “The CZU Fire consumed all of the leaves on some of the tallest and oldest trees in the world, yet many are recovering. Redwoods’ scientific name is ‘sempervirens,’ which means ever-flourishing. It’s very satisfying to have learned a bit more about how this remarkable species lives up to its name.”
YouTube Video
-
Cool. The only thing I’ve seen grow back faster than those redwoods is my nose hairs. Ha ha ha!
Cheers and Jeers for Thursday, December 14, 2023
Note: For the treatment of minor aches and pains, ask your doctor if asking your doctor is right for you. And just to be sure, ask your doctor if asking your doctor for a second opinion from your doctor is right for you. Then just go grab a fistful of pills from the dispensary when they’re not looking and run like hell.
—Your Friends at BillyCo Mystery Pharmaceuticals
-
2 days!!!
By the Numbers:
Days 'til Festivus: 9
Days 'til the 250th anniversary of the Boston Tea Party: 2
Estimated percent of active-duty ground troops that Russia has lost—around 315,000—versus what it had before its invasion of Ukraine: 87%
Portion of its tanks Russia has lost: 2/3
Rank of Paris, Dubai, and Madrid in the latest Top 100 City Destinations Index by Euromonitor International: #1, #2, #3
Rank of highest-ranked U.S. cities New York and Los Angeles: #8, #19
Number of holiday trees in the Biltmore Estate in Asheville, North Carolina: 67
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Your Thursday Molly Ivins Moment:
What a campaign! Jesse Ventura took offense at someone else's manners? Mr. Etiquette, the Sensitive Male.
Poor Charlton Heston, who is suffering from Alzheimer's, no shame to him, was trotted around the country and held up by both arms while he urged us to get more guns. Both candidates for governor in California were capable of causing tooth decay in anyone forced to listen to them. In Texas, our governor merely accused his opponent of being a drug dealer and murderer. Slime and negativity from coast to coast.
In Texas, we have elected wall-to-wall dipsticks who have to figure out how to close what could be a $40 billion budget gap. They've all sworn to eat worms and die before raising taxes, so this should be entertaining.
—December 2002
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Puppy Pic of the Day: This one has a squirrel cameo…
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CHEERS to informed opinions. One of the imperatives in this crazy world is holding the powerful to account when they make predictions. The bolder their prediction, the accountier the holding must be. And one year ago this week, our illustrious Treasury Secretary Janet Yellen told 60 Minutes that inflation would be "much lower" by…well, by this time right now. So let's check with the Bureau of Labor Statistics to compare last year's inflation rate and this year's:
One year ago: The Consumer Price Index for All Urban Consumers rose 0.1 percent in November on a seasonally adjusted basis. Over the last 12 months, the all items index increased 7.1 percent before seasonal adjustment.
Much Nostradamus I sense in her.
Now: The Consumer Price Index for All Urban Consumers increased 0.1 percent in November on a seasonally adjusted basis. Over the last 12 months, the all items index increased 3.1 percent before seasonal adjustment.
Excellent—a solid prediction, Janet. Well done. But we're still a little disappointed. Nothing, not a word, about dropping bundles of cash from helicopters over major New England cities to spur economic growth by letting it trickle down to the rest of the country. Honest to god, I don’t know why I even bother to call her every night at 3am with my brilliant ideas.
CHEERS to payback time. I'm all-in for the elimination of gerrymandering. The sooner we have federal legislation appointing independent commissions to fairly decide district maps, the better. But until then, Republicans will continue cranking out House districts that look like the gooey trail a drunk snail leaves behind on the sidewalk and Democrats better be ready to reciprocate. So this is welcome news in the Empire State:
Flip 'em all, I say. “Congratulations, Speaker Hakeem Jeffries” has such a nice ring to it.
CHEERS to “Moscow Maggie.” Happy 126th birthday to Maine's own Margaret Chase Smith. She was the first woman to serve in both the U.S. House and Senate, and she reserved some choice not-so-nice words for Senator Joseph McCarthy (who responded by giving her the aforementioned nickname). And get a load of this from 1950, which would no doubt get her branded a libturd by the right-wing noise machine today:
"I don't want to see the Republican Party ride to political victory on the Four Horsemen of Calumny—Fear, Ignorance, Bigotry and Smear.
A Republican who actually cared about the American people.
I doubt if the Republican Party could—simply because I don't believe the American people will uphold any political party that puts political exploitation above national interest. Surely we Republicans aren't that desperate for victory.
I don't want to see the Republican Party win that way. While it might be a fleeting victory for the Republican Party, it would be a more lasting defeat for the American people.
Surely it would ultimately be suicide for the Republican Party and the two-party system that has protected our American liberties from the dictatorship of a one party system."
Yeah. They'd be crazy to try that. And don’t call me Shirley.
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BRIEF SANITY BREAK
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BRIEF SANITY BREAK
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Welcoming the holiday season at the Matsue Vogel Park, Shimane, Japan [matsuevogelpark]pic.twitter.com/OsTxPtAWu8
— Massimo (@Rainmaker1973) December 12, 2023
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END BRIEF SANITY BREAK
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END BRIEF SANITY BREAK
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JEERS to missing 1800 by 18 days. He came this close. On December 14, 1799,George Washington died at age 67 (which was actually quite old for his family, relatively speaking, given how many of his relatives died at a younger age). He caught a cold during a horseback ride in the rain, but forensic historians suspect that the real reason he expired was the 300-pound leech doctors attached to him to drain his "tired" blood. I read in the book His Excellency by Joseph Ellis (highly recommended) that the last thing Washington did before he died was check his own pulse. Which probably explains his last words: "Oh, that ain't good."
CHEERS to kicking the bums out. Though it often seems like authoritarian governments are damn-near impossible to dislodge, that ain't always the case. Exhibit A this week is Poland, where the unthinkable just got thunk:
In a cathartic moment for many in Poland, centrist political veteran Donald Tusk got the nod on Monday to be the country’s next prime minister, marking the end of eight years of right-wing nationalist rule and a dramatic shift in the European political landscape. Tusk’s alliance secured a majority in October elections with a promise to restore Polish democracy and the country’s relationship with European allies.
Donald Tusk celebrates.
“This is a wonderful day, not for me, but for all those who have deeply believed over these years that things will get even better, that we will chase away the darkness, that we will chase away evil,” Tusk said, addressing the Polish people on Monday night.
“From tomorrow, we will be able to right the wrongs so that everyone, without exception, can feel at home,” he added.
Excellent. It'll be nice watching them join the ranks of enlightened nations again. By the way: if you're wondering how many Poles it takes to change a light bulb, shame on you. Shame shame shame shame shame.
-
Ten years ago in C&J: December 14, 2013
JEERS to life inside the bubble. Last week Fox News host Megyn Kelly caused a stir when she made a big fat hairy deal out of the alleged "fact" that both Jesus and Santa Claus are "just white." Friday she backpedaled and claimed that—of course!—her race-baiting was the ha-ha jokey kind of race baiting, people. Which it wasn't, because neither she nor her guests cracked a smile at the time (except Candy Crowley, but that's just the perma-botox). But her real problem this morning isn’t with the left's criticism of her comments. Rather it's with her conservative viewers, who thought she was gloriously correct about white SantaJesus, but are now wondering why she's gone all Massachusetts Kum By Yah Liberal on them. It's left them fearful, confused and agitated. In other words: Megyn Kelly has done her job well.
-
And just one more…
CHEERS to D-Day 2020. Can’t let today slide by without noting that December 14th will be noted as the day America—and all the restaurants, theaters, gyms, and bowling alleys therein—was saved by a bunch of little pricks. And I admit that I remember getting a bit verklempt watching it happen:
[T]he battle against Covid-19 took what could be a decisive turn Monday as the first federally approved coronavirus vaccine was injected into an American arm.
Good on ya, Nurse Lindsay.
Sandra Lindsay, an ICU nurse who has been on the front lines of the battle against a virus that's killed almost 300,000 people in the United States alone, joined in the applause moments after the first dose was injected into her left arm.
"I feel hopeful today, relieved," Lindsay, who works at at Long Island Jewish Medical Center said…"I feel the healing is coming. I hope this marks the beginning of the end of the very painful time in our history."
The vaccines (and the follow-up miracle covid happy pills) have come a log way since then. For instance, one of the tricky things about that early vaccine was it keeping it stored in a receptacle that was super-duper-icy cold. Today they can just be shipped under normal refrigeration. But it was pretty dicey back then. The only known way for each shipping container to reach minus-94 degrees Fahrenheit was to let it be stared at for 30 seconds by Laura Ingraham.
Have a nice Thursday. Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?
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